THE DAY
As always, starting a new section for a different character is really difficult. You haven’t hung out with the kid in a couple of weeks; you’ve not really put much thought in what he’s been doing. The husband once said that he imagined my characters kind of hanging out, whistling, checking their watches, tapping their feet, wondering just when Ilsa was going to give them some attention already.
So that’s what it was a little bit like today. In fact, I didn’t sleep well. Kept waking up all night long, fretting about where I should go with the character even though I already thought I knew. Got up a little bleary-eyed and definitely a bit on edge. A couple of hours into it–even though I’d written out story beats–I’m thinking, oh give it up, go do something else.
But I just did what I did yesterday: screwed my butt into the chair and kept at it. There’s no other way to get rid of white space and that blank page than to fill it with words, either good or bad. As it turned out, I think they were all relatively good words (although I have already thought of tweaks and things that need changing up, but that’s all par for the course). I just need to take this one step at a time and not get so impatient that I start to believe–just one more time–that I can’t write at all.
Anyway, put in my time until I just couldn’t anymore and still make it to the gym. I did miss my window at several stores, but oh well–no one will starve. Did my 90 minutes of aerobics and got kind of hot while doing that (not just sweaty; but kind of ticked; see below).
Now, home; listening to Obama on CNN; getting dinner ready. Also had a kind of back and forth with someone on Facebook today who’d posted about Obama’s actions being so very Christian. That just rubbed me the wrong way. Christians do not have a monopoly on compassion or morality; Obama has never once invoked Christianity to explain what he feels he ought to do. Once again, I just have to shake my head at how religion keeps creeping into the conversation. Whatever happened to freedom FROM religion? Enough already.
WRITING OUT LOUD
GHOST IN THE MACHINE
Day 1: 4326 Day 11: 2500 Day 21: 1800 Day 31: 745
Day 2: 2085 Day 12: 500 Day 22: 0 Day 32: 0
Day 3: 3011 Day 13: 1000 Day 23: 2700 Day 33: 4000
Day 4: 2652. Day 14: 3700 Day 24: 3500 Day 34: 2800
Day 5: 3210 Day 15: 5630 Day 25: 1500 Day 35: 4500
Day 6: 3450 Day 16: 1060 Day 26: 0 Day 36: 4800
Day 7: 0 Day 17: 130 Day 27: 0
Day 8: 2756 Day 18: 0 Day 28: 380
Day 9: 4580 Day 19: 3000 Day 29: 390
Day 10: 2670 Day 20: 2600 Day 30: 380
Blog Post: 960
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What I’m Watching:
Making a Murderer; I think I’m on the third episode? Yeah. Anyway, here’s what gets me: I’ve been reading about this all on Facebook with people weighing in how they think Avery is innocent; their blood just boils; etc., etc. Now, understand, I am NOT suggesting that the guy is guilty; I don’t know if he’s innocent either. All I know is what the storyteller wants me to see, and I think that’s where people are losing some perspective. These filmmakers are not dispassionate; they have to pick and choose what they will feature. They are not saying that this is an act of journalism (and most journalists are not dispassionate or even-handed; they all have agendas, and journalists have ALWAYS had agendas going back all the way to when journalism was born). So the idea that somehow or other we are being given the “whole” story–or even the most important bits–is ludicrous. I agree; if there’s been a miscarriage of justice, if there’s been a conspiracy–then, yes, investigate. But we were not there; we are being shown carefully edited information presented in a very particular way. In fact, I found the civil rights lawyers to be unctuous, self-righteous leeches; they were into this for money, period. All of a sudden, when the guy’s got no money . . . where are they? Is there anyone offering services pro bono save for The Innocence Project people? No. Are they on film and on record saying how happy they are that Avery gets money because now he can buy a defense? Yes. So let’s not lose sight of the fact that these lawyers were not acting out of the goodness of their hearts. They were into it for the publicity, the notoriety, and the money.
So I find it rather alarming that otherwise smart people rush to judgment and are so easily manipulated by only what the filmmakers want them to see. I think what’s more interesting here, too, is not Avery–but his nephew, Dassey. I haven’t gotten far enough to know for sure yet, but he was 16 at the time. It’s not illegal to interrogate kids that age without parents present and if he waived his Miranda rights. But false confessions happen more than people know, and young people make them much more frequently. Plus–and again, I don’t know enough about the case, so this is just a guess–the kid seemed both depressed and not that bright. Lower IQ kids (and depressed ones) are much likely to be confused during intense interrogations and easily misled into making statements that aren’t true. They also don’t have much capacity to reflect into the future: to understand the implication of their actions.
Anyway, that’s what occurs to me. I don’t know if Avery is innocent. All I know is that I’m watching what the filmmakers want me to see. The only thing that gets my blood boiling are armchair, Monday-morning armchair lawyers.
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What I’m Reading:
Just started Pet Sematary again. Too early to see if I’m hooked yet.
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What I’m Listening to:
Handling the Undead…but I’m also losing patience. This just isn’t that compelling a story. I’ll give it another hour or so and then decide.
