Revving Back Up

THE DAY

The day began the way I kinda knew it would: slowly.  In fact, I spun my proverbial wheels for quite a while, fretting about what I was really doing here. This is weird, considering that I’d actually outlined the damned section last night, but I guess I either wasn’t listening to myself or decided that what I’d written wasn’t worth the electrons I’d already killed.  I just couldn’t find the character’s voice.

So that’s what it came down to: finding the damn character. Considering that she was one I hadn’t given much thought to, maybe taking some time to capture her voice shouldn’t be that surprising.  But for a very long time, I was pacing around the damned house, thinking, Shit, shit, shit, I shouldn’t have taken any time off.  (Yes, I have a very severe super-ego.  Just nickname it Dad.)

So I fumbled.  A lot. I tried various gambits, none of which really felt right.  After struggling for HOURS, I finally stumbled on the right tone. Made words, but I’m sure I’ll end up killing many tomorrow.  Finally had to break off and go to the gym and do various errands before shops closed; did my 90 minutes of aerobics.

I also think that I’ll finish this section tomorrow and then move on.  I’m still not exactly sure where this will slot in, but that’s okay. In a way, this reminds me of how I managed THE DICKENS MIRROR: a thousand pages, about four hundred that never ended up being seen.  But I know them.  This is like research: the point is not to share everything you’ve learned but to let what you’ve learned inform what you share.

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WRITING OUT LOUD

GHOST IN THE MACHINE

Day 1: 4326

Day 2: 2085

Day 3: 3011

Day 4: 2652

Day 5: 3210

Day 6: 3450

Day 7: 0

Day 8: 2756

 

Blog Post: 470

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What I’m Watching:

The Astronaut Wives Club: another two episodes; I’m hooked, especially now that they’ve stopped trying to shock me with how repressive things were for women (and the very few blacks they show in the series; the Rene Carpenter character invites a little boy to go with them to watch a launch, but the boy—Xavier, who’s black—reminds her that colored kids aren’t allowed on Coco Beach).  Instead, they’re focused on the characters’ stories, which are taking interesting turns now that the Gemini Wives have shown up.  I have to admit: I feel this little pang every time Gus Grissom shows up.

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What I’m Reading:

The Grownup by Gillian Flynn: like I said, it’s only okay.  I definitely would’ve felt pissed if I’d bought this, but we’re talking only a short story here.  I’m at the point, though, where things feel as if they might take an unexpected, horror-story turn.  So we’ll see. I’m sticking with it, so that’s something.

Didn’t pick up any other book today.  No time.

 

Author: Ilsa

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