The other day, someone asked how finishing a trilogy felt. Sad came to mind although I wasn’t sure if that was exactly what I meant. Empty is more like it, I guess, but I feel that way after any book, so finishing a trilogy isn’t all that different for me. It’s one of the reasons that I make like a shark and keep moving on to the next project. In truth, I didn’t feel quite as sad/empty after SHADOWS because I knew there was more to the story and yet another book to come. (But I was plenty grumpy; just ask the husband how relieved he was when I started WHITE SPACE.) With MONSTERS now out, there’s a certain finality, a true closing of that chapter, and I feel the end—and loss—of this series much more intensely than I thought I would. I wouldn’t say it’s more than my standalones; I know that I always wonder what happens next for all my characters. But leaving this series is definitely tough—and more so, now that it’s actually on shelves.
I’ve never finished a trilogy before, so I really wasn’t prepared for just how intense the ride and loss are. Notice that word: finished. Once upon a time, back in my Mechwarrior days, I was on tap for a trilogy; I’d even written the first two books and was looking forward to the third. Unfortunately, the line disappeared beneath my feet (or my keyboard, as it were). That happens. Imprints go away; licenses aren’t renewed; publishers fold. I remember being sad then, too, but in a different way because I really wanted to finish this character’s story. All I could think was, whoa, there she is, little Katana Tormark, with only one friend left to her in the whole wide world . . . and it just so happens that he’s also the psychopath who murdered just about everyone she ever loved. (God, I loved that psychopath to death. Jonathan was a gas, so flippin’ fun to write, because he was so perverse. I mean, we’re talking really really perverse, and in the most deliciously seductive way. When I was a forensic shrink, I paid attention.
Talk about an unfinished life.
The same thing happened to me with a character arc and set of stories I was developing—and had already set up in previous novellas—in the Star Trek: SCE series. Never heard of them? I’m not surprised. SCE was e-book only (with compilations released in paperback a year later). The series editor, Keith DeCandido, understood the importance of e-books before they really caught on, and so the series fell victim to the fact that there just weren’t many platforms and the experience wasn’t so hot. I think you could read them as pdfs or something; I know I squinted through several on my first little Palm Pilot. (And how times have changed; go back and watch the first two seasons of NCIS, and see Kate poke her Palm with a stylus. A decade ago, that was hot stuff.) Anyway, that series was ahead of its time in so many ways, and was eventually axed by Paramount, even though the paperbacks did fine (and, in fact, the one in which my two-parter, WOUNDS, appeared did extremely well in paperback, and still does pretty fine, all things considered).
Anyway, because Paramount pulled the plug, the fabulous four-book arc I was planning and set up in the WOUNDS sequel/follow-on, GHOSTS never got off the ground. So Elizabeth Lense remains strained on Earth, a character in limbo—and still pregnant, by the way—and now I’ll never know what happens because I can’t write that character’s story anymore. She belongs to Trek, not me.
But these ASHES guys are my characters, my babies. So I guess what we’re talking about here is when and if you finally let go and a character—or characters—leaves your life, which isn’t all that dissimilar to letting go of a kid, a sort of go forth, young man kind of thing. Some author-parents are better at tolerating that empty nest than others. Me, I fill the emptiness with other stories and new kids to worry about. But I can see how, as often happens, writers want to revisit these characters and the story to which they’ve got this incredibly intense attachment. I’ve certainly read blogs where writers talk about how they wish they could’ve written a fourth book (or more), only their publisher wouldn’t take it, or whatever. Conversely, I’ve seen a few reviewers’ blogs—not many, but some—where they say, up-front, that they hope that an otherwise fine writer moves on to something new and different.
I’m only talking about myself here, but I think I can understand both sides to this story: the desire to continue versus the need to let go and leave the story as it stands. I even understand the calculus of an editor or publishing house. Clearly, if there truly is more to say—or a series has velocity and a writer has the enthusiasm and more story to tell (I think we all know series where there was no more story, but the series was doing so well, that people just kept coming back to that well; and, conversely, how a series was left to quietly die by a house when the story wasn’t even close to being done)—then, yes, writing that next book makes sense. In a traditional house, you might even have had that discussion with an editor ahead of time, maybe as soon as you realized there was more to say and do.
But I also think—and, again, I’m only talking about myself here—that, after doing what you set out to do, you have to be able to step away for a little while and just wait a bit. Be patient; let things settle down and all the emotions even out. Sure, it’s hard. It hurts. You feel awful and even worse when people tell you how much they love what you’re doing (and you’re convinced, as I am so often, that you’ll never write anything half that good again). But it’s a little like deciding whether you’ll call your kid every week, or leave it up to your kid to decide what she wants. I have two kids; one likes to touch base every week; the other is perfectly happy to talk for hours, but she’s also fine with zero contact for a good long while—and that’s okay. I’ve left all that up for each to decide what fits best. I’m confident they’ll talk to me when I want, and vice versa.
So I guess what I’m trying to say is that if and when a writer feels the need to revisit a series . . . maybe it’s wise to decide if that’s what the series wants and needs, whether you self-pub or go the traditional route. Obviously, it’s a lot easier to jump into another book if you self-pub; you don’t have to wait for someone to decide it’s okay.
But . . . hold on . . . wait a second: are you doing it because the series is just begging for another book, or you are? I’m serious here. See, I said good-bye to MONSTERS several months ago: there was the writing of the book and then the revisions and then the copy-edits back and forth. A lot of months of getting myself all worked up and then crashing every time I finished the book (again) before picking myself up, blowing my nose, and moving on. Now that it’s hit shelves . . . I’m having to really focus on not looking over my shoulder, not longing for that series—which feels so much more polished (because it is) than the miserable specimen of a book I’m currently drafting for the first time—and not giving in to the idea/temptation/desire to go back to characters I adore and lives with which I am so intimately familiar. It’s a real struggle.
Now, is there another ASHES book (or two or more) in me? I want to say yes; I even know what the fourth book would be about and where I’d go from there. But will I write it? No, not now and for more reasons than just one. First off, I have other people/characters/kids I care about, and their books to write. But I also understand that returning to the trilogy right this second is seductive because it’s familiar and I’m so comfortable with these kids. Yet I’m not totally convinced that, at the moment, they’ve picked up the phone; that they’re actually dialing and trying to connect. Before I return, I need to be sure that they’ve called me because they need me . . . not the other way around.
So, for now, let’s say that the next move is up to them.
* * *
Say, before you go, don’t forget to enter the Goodreads giveaway for your chance at a signed copy of MONSTERS *and* a nifty ASHES backpack, stuffed with some decent survival stuff. Give my kids a home, why doncha’?
Oh, and in the spirit of moving on . . . a bunch of you chimed in on those profile pics (and thanks; it was interesting to hear how people respond to a picture). Anyway, as you can see . . . I’ve changed the pic because, honestly you really do want to stay away from my cheese.
You should totaly make a movie too!!!!!!
is it giong to be a movie?!?!?!?!?! **wink, wink** **nudge,nude**!!!
not nude, i meant to write nugde
No worries.
My best advice can be found here: http://adr3nalin3.blogspot.com/2012/01/so-you-wanna-be-contender.html.
Oh, gosh, I don’t know. By the time anyone would get around to this, all the faces would change, you know? Like the girl who was in the Divergent series? I thought she would’ve been great. But a film version of the trilogy or TV series really isn’t up to me anyway. Someone in Hollywood has to think of it and then pony up the cash, etc.
Or TV series. Wouldn’t that be AWESOME?
Sadly, not up to me. Hollywood has to get its collective asses in gear, which they won’t. People are always about the new thing, not the thing that happened a couple years back. They just don’t see/realize that ASHES is out there; they’re all about special effects and futuristic scenarios.
😉
If they don’t relize that this amazing book is out there then they are blind! 😉
P.S- thanks for the link Ilsa your so awesome! I want to be a writer like you one day! 🙂
P.P.S- are you doing any public appearances anytime soon??? You should too I know a lot of people at my school who loves your books!!!!
Also by the way i made one of my monthly book reports about Ashes and i got a 98%. The teacher loved the story of your story and he even read the book too! He’s going to start reading Shadows now, but he really loves your books!
p.s- The teacher’s name is Mr.Matias
Sorry for the copy and paste of the message before <3
A T.V series for this book would be so awesome!!!
One more thing Ilsa, (sorry if i’m wasting your time) but your not like other authors. They never answer backs to their fans on their websites but you do which I love! You are awesome! 🙂 🙂 🙂
Sorry it took me a couple days to get back to you! Life kinda intervened 😉
I’m happy to be helpful, dear. No worries. Just keep writing.
Public appearances: sadly, no. I’m between books right now, so I best get cracking, eh?
Thanks for spreading the word, hon!
Cool! Tell your teacher hi from me 😉
I agree–and don’t I wish!
Well, to be honest, I think that not replying is kinda rude, don’t you? I mean, someone goes to all that trouble–works up his or her courage to get in touch–and you don’t reply? Not very polite.
OTOH, maybe the other folks are just really, really busy and super-crazy famous? If I were super-crazy famous, maybe I wouldn’t answer…but I bet I’d try. I remember writing to some of my favorite authors and actors and how CRUSHING it was not to hear back. So I feel ya.
Your awesome love ya like a fan girl <3 🙂
P.S- you are super crazy famous to me anyway so thanks for everything
P.P.S- are you doing any public appearances (particularly in Canada)
also do you watch anime? It would be super crazy awesome if you do!!! My favourite anime is Deathnote and S.A.O you should watch anime it is awesome sauce i love it!;)
P.S- It’s super really awesome that i’m talking to my favourite author, am i dreaming? This is so awesome sauce!!! 😉
Thanks, hon.
Sadly, no. :’-(
I have watched it in the past, though only sporadically and mostly when my kids were at home. OTOH, I love hearing what people who aren’t old fogies like me enjoy. So, thanks!
I’m pleased that YOU”RE pleased. Made my morning, hon. Now, time for coffee and work.
hahaha your so cool!!! You make my day everytime you text back which is awesome sauce. 😉
P.S- are you doing any public appearances (particularly in Canada)
i know i already asked you that question but still i really wanna know!!! If yes what time is it and where i would love to come and meet you! Your so super nice! 🙂
Sorry i meant to write are you planning on doing any cuz i would be the first one there. Maybe even in Ontario, THAT WOULD BE AWESOME!!!!! 🙂 😉 🙂
Wait a minute in your last text to me you wrote that it was time for coffee and “work” which book are you working on or do you have another job? I apologize if i’m sounding so talkative it’s not that common for people to be talking to their favourite authors!!!
No worries. Work as in writing. Writing is my work 😉
It would be and I love Ontario, but as I said… 🙁
Hon, I would really, really tell you if I were going to make some trips up your way. Unfortunately, no. ☹️
thats sad 🙁 , but it’s ok and i really appreciate you writing to me thanks 🙂 !!!
Honestly answer me…. do you think i’m annoying you by texting you so much on your website. I’m really sorry if i am annoying you, i was just very excited! Us Canadians and apologizing, eh? 😉 (<- I was saying that in a sarcastic voice) 🙂 🙂 🙂 !!!
sorry again though. 🙂
You’re fine 🙂
Again, my pleasure.
Now, why would I be annoyed? This is what the website (and FB and Twitter) are all about: a way for folks to be in touch. It’s fine, dear.
Thanks!!! 🙂 Your the best!!!! 😉
I just finished reading Monsters and I absolutely loved it. It’s one of the best books I’ve read in a while. I first read Ashes back in high school when it first came out but life happened and I forgot about it for a bit since Shadows wasn’t out yet, but I never truly forgot about the series. It often came to my mind when I was at book stores and eventually I gave up and bought it online. I’m so glad I did. It is a amazing and captivating story and I do hope that like you wrote in this article you might someday write a fourth book. I think I am probably going to dig into some of your other books soon as well. I always love and hate when Authors make me cry but the ones that do are forever my favorites. Thank you for sharing your writing with the world.
Samantha, thank you so much for both reading and your perseverance! I’m glad you enjoyed the books. I think of them often and keep wondering if I ought not continue, but the time never seems right. So I don’t know. As I said, I think I have to wait for the characters to become just irresistible. 😉
The ending of monsters depressed me, I have so many questions! My main one being what happens to wolf?? I can’t believe the book is finished, I am very sad right now ☹️
Oh, hon, I know how you feel. I was down when the book ended, too. Sometimes, though, you need to know when to walk away and I had told all the story I had in me to tell right then. I didn’t WANT to leave these guys; I’m as curious as the next person; but there are some stories that need time to marinate. I think this is one of those. I may or may not get back to them, but those guys are off having their lives. When they want me to tell all about that, they’ll let me know 😉
I’m glad you enjoyed the series.
I love how your answers are never closed off they’re open to interpretation, but I can’t help but wonder, have they picked up the phone and called you yet Ilsa?
I read this trilogy when I was 13. I am 20 years old now and I still think about these characters and the story line often. It had such an impact on me that I was/still am convinced my first child will be called Alex.
I devoured these books with such haste and had so many questions that when ‘Monsters’ ended in the way that it did, for the first time ever, my heart ached over a book and I haven’t felt a feeling like it since.
I know the chances of you seeing this now are slim, but I know it would make 13 year old me happy to let you know how much it impacted us and how we’re eagerly waiting for those characters to ring.
Oh, Madi…I’m afraid that all my characters haven’t yet saved up enough to buy that iPhone…
I’ll let y’all know if they do, though.
Ilsa